7 Ways To Rest & Let Yourself Be Human When You're A Leader

I remember times when I was first church planting where "come to me and I will give you rest" felt too good to be true. 

Any time I read Matthew 11:28-30, all I could think was: That's not accessible. If this "yoke" is supposed to be "easy and light", I'm definitely not experiencing that. 

But throughout my journey in leadership, I've learned I have to let myself be human and make space for rest.

I’ve learned to shift the care of my soul from “if I have more time, I can get to it”—to instead, this is the center of what I need in order to live and breathe.

But Matthew 11:28-30 is your invitation, too. Come to me. Jesus is good for His word, you can rely on Him. And I will give you rest.

And this is not a passive invitation. Receiving the invitation to rest also looks like being proactive, moving things around in your schedule. This can be pretty inconvenient—yet worth more than you can imagine.

So, if you're feeling a little "weary and heavy-laden", here are 7 ways to rest—and let yourself be human—when you're a leader:

1. Schedule non-negotiable family and rest time.

It’s possible. To put “family” and “rest” in your week’s timetable—and not have a text message or work emergency interrupt it.

When rest becomes a weapon, your approach to life and work comes from a completely different place and pace. Rest is not an optional extra, but a strategic priority. It’s time to schedule it accordingly.

2. Let yourself sleep.

At a minimum to keep going, you need 4 hours of sleep. But there’s no healing and no replenishment to your brain to support your creative output, your relational skills, or your overall health. That’s what happens in 8 hours.

This stuff literally happens when you sleep. So, get to bed—and let it happen.

3. Be honest with your own weaknesses and be accountable to others in them.

You’ve seen the results of burned-out leaders when they keep going without any regard for their soul. But it doesn't have to be that way for you.

It starts with honesty—and a commitment to get help. You’re not alone. Make that call. Send that text.

4. Learn ways to bring peace to your mind and body when you’re busy.

Start with your breathing. Intentionally slowing it down provides much-needed calm to your overstimulated Central Nervous System.

Try it for just a few minutes:

8 counts inhale, hold for two counts, 8 counts to exhale hold for two counts, repeat.

5. Learn to receive affirmation, generosity, and love.

You give your time and heart all day, every day. You’re encouraging, supportive, and affirming of your team and those you work with. But don’t forget you need some of that, too.

Someone gives you a compliment? Start by saying thank you.

6. Remember the bigger story.

Euguene H. Peterson, pastor and author, wrote,

“We’re in a story in which everything eventually comes together, a narrative in which all the puzzling parts finally fit, about which years later we exclaim, oh so that’s what that meant!”

Things don’t always make sense in the middle. But take a step back. There’s a larger story.

7. Have outlets for fun and creativity.

There’s plenty of science on it, but you know that. You just need to remember fun is not for everyone else—but for you, too.

So, give it a shot. Go to a pottery class. Draw with a toddler. Skip rocks on a river.

Giving yourself the permission to play may be the most human thing you could do as a leader—and transform things for everyone.

Looking for more resources to lead from a place of soul health?

For 12 weeks, get an email that encourages you to care for your own soul and the souls of those in your care, with practical ways to put it into action. 

by Mindy Caliguire & Kayla Norris