When I looked at my schedule—and my pace—I knew I needed to call for backup.
I was leading a volunteer media team that was about to go from 6 people to 2. I was managing social media for 3 international organizations. I was coordinating media announcements for a 5,000-person event that was 3 months away. My schedule was… full, to say the least.
Because, well, life happened. Or… the opposite. Within a two-week span, my media team co-leader’s grandpa passed away, then a team member’s great-grandpa passed away, then a friend’s grandpa. And grief has this domino effect—it hits one person, then another, and another—until you’re the one walking home on the verge of tears.
So, I didn’t have time for an online course.
I used pieces of the reflection resources, even watched some videos that were excerpts of the course. I figured I didn’t need to go deeper than what I saw on social media. I had the general idea of soul care, right?
But in March, a coworker mentioned a part of the course I didn’t even know existed. Then I read a few testimonials by recent participants. They talked about a transformative experience—not a bite-sized exercise. I mean, bite-size reflections are great.
I had to learn from leaders who had been in the battle zone of fast-paced work and ministry.
I couldn't keep doing what I was doing on my own.
I decided to wake up an hour earlier than normal. Just for a day, to try it out. It was the week before daylight savings switched, and I kept waking up to the sun streaming through my windows (I need to get blackout curtains already). So, I had no excuses.
I was surprised how well it worked. I watched the introduction videos, took the Soul Health Assessment, scheduled my first Spiritual Direction session, and wrote some reflections from the prompts.
I tried it the next day, and the next.
I got confronted by quotes like “Nothing conflicts with love of Christ like service to Christ” (Henri Nouwen) and “Rest isn’t just when you have nothing better to do—rest is a strategic priority” (Mindy Caliguire). I loved the practical tips on how to have a prayer walk, and fresh reminders of the importance of silence and solitude.
Then I'd wrap up my journaling, eat breakfast, and head to work.
That's when I got the text message that kick-started the domino week of grief.
What do you even say in those moments? You can’t say much, other than “please don’t come into the office” and “I’ve got your tasks covered, don’t worry about it”.
And you pray. You pray a lot.
In Session 4, Mindy Caliguire reads aloud Psalm 88 and describes how its author comes to no solution, but instead, is raw and honest with God.
“Only when we come to that moment of authenticity and we’re willing to give voice to what’s really going on—do we actually open the door for God to meet us in those painful places.
And He can. And He will.”
I was able to respond with sensitivity and prayer (and a well-needed coffee break).
I wasn't confused about my priorities.
I knew what mattered—the soul health of my team, right in front of me.
And that afternoon, when my office emptied out and I was left swamped by multiple jobs that I knew I couldn’t finish—I realized I needed to write a Psalm 88 of my own. I went home, cancelled my normal program, and journaled, sang, read my Bible, and cried.
It was exactly what I needed.
But life and death—and everything in between—is part of our human experience. Team members and leaders alike.
I learned that if I don't make margin for those moments—I'm letting myself be less than human—and teaching my team to do the same. But as a leader, I'm still human. And leading my team through grief or just the daily demands of work and ministry—starts with me caring for my soul.
This world-class 8 week online journey (1-2 hours per week) provides a comprehensive introduction to the themes of Soul Care in the context of leadership. The course can be completed individually or as a cohort, synchronously or asynchronously, along with a facilitator from Soul Care.
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